inspiration

its a hard thing to find sometimes

i started film school today.

i have mdma and m83 to thank for this.
not to mention grandma's money.
hopefully i'll be a better person in nine months.

current obsessions

grapefruit juice

















joy division















perique blend
















fantasizing about moving to brooklyn















sonpub



















oh. i saw a bumper sticker yesterday that i rather liked. it read:

"religion is for people that are afraid of going to hell. spirituality is for people who've already been there"

i'm going back to film school.

don't you dare try and stop me.

WHY ARE THE YOUTH SO SULLEN

In all of these photographs
on all of these tiny portals -
So sullen and snide
bathed by smoky morning light
and none seeming to own but half a shirt
and always always someone is jumping through the air
(A cousin? A brother? A boyfriend? – gosh he loves to jump)

Worried shoulders
gaze fixed on the horizon
where something they can not yet process
is afoot -

Adulthood.

- DALLAS CLAYTON

so much to say

but not there are no words.

time to pick up the puzzle pieces.
and reassemble.
it'll take longer than i want.
and i don't want to even start trying.

career.

i love music. i want to make it.
i don't even want to become a rockstar.




















i love writing. i want to write.
writing about music would be fun as well.
















i love film. i even went to school for one semester to learn how to make them.
a very small part of me still wants to direct.



















i want to study pop culture and sociology. humans are fascinating to me.




















i was watching pbs a few months ago and i also felt lead to consider children's educational television.



















creative marketing seems fun as well.

i have no idea where i'm going.
that's all.

this is going to happen.

it has to happen.

now that its june, we can sleep in the garden

its the summer.
i'm moving into a new apartment.
things are changing.
getting better.

i simply am not there

Dear God,

thank you for weed.

love,
peter

the wulf

Nels Cline + Devin Sarno - the wulf from ZF FILMS on Vimeo.

hands in the air.

Light from my window sill,
make my way to the door
I hang my head and still,
I know You're wanting more
Over the threshold now,
I move across the yard
All that my will allows,
my every step is hard
Now in the garden I carve out six feet of space
There make my will comply,
lie down upon my face
Been toe to toe too long,
I'm tired of fighting You
I see You were too strong,
cause I am black and blue
But now I understand a losers due to win
How every dying man is sure to rise again
So I raise my left hand one,
I raise my right hand too
Under the morning sun, my spirit cries to You

this is NOT a music blog

But the new Yeah Yeah Yeahs track is just too good not to mention.


http://www.pampelmoose.com/mspeaks/2009/02/yeah-yeah-yeahs-zero-from-new-album-its-blitz-mp3

coolest kicks ever.

priorities?

yeah.
the past 4 or so posts have been in vain.

put your hands on the wheel. let the golden age begin.

Its a treacherous road
With a desolated view
There's distant lights
But here they're far and few
And the sun don't shine
Even when its day
You gotta drive all night
Just to feel like you're okay

found your bottle.

CURRENTLY:

I wear a coat of feelings and they are loud.

balance beaming brightly

as we assemble our words
and thoughts
and ideals
and plans for the future
into our little boxes that we keep them in
for safekeeping
i'll pick one out
that i've held onto for ages
and thought about
and i'll hand it to her
timidly
but like i planned it
(which i totally did)

she inspects it
she wasn't expecting this
(but totally was)
she sighs
and says with a little bit of a chuckle in her voice
"oh, you."

and that's all it takes.

st. valentine's day

for those of you that were with me last year,
you know that my valentines day was probably one of the greatest nights of my life.
well.
fuck that.
its about to be replaced (in four weeks) by something better.
someone better.
the best.
my heart flutters with anticipation.

insomnia

this is how i feel.

when you have insomnia nothing's real and nothing's fake.
i just want to cuddle with someone special.
maybe that's what's keeping me up.